That Thing That Scares You: Dive In Head First!

For months now, I have been planning, working, designing, and creating a whole new purpose and business for myself. While I wanted to wait until everything was perfect, so that I could pull back the curtain and show you all of the amazing thing at once, I instead found myself holding back in fear.

On Friday, I kicked fear to the curb and I announced my new business name: Sincerely, Jackie.

I don't have my website ready yet (soon though, I promise!), I don't have the new items in the shop, I haven't finished the new Facebook page, and I don't even have all of my final business cards back from the printer.

But I feel amazing.

Before the announcement, I think I put so much pressure on myself to be perfect that I actually began setting myself up for failure. Nothing in life is perfect, so why was I trying so hard to do the impossible?

By letting go and diving in, head first, without over analyzing, over thinking, or over planning, I have managed to do the one thing that I have been afraid of. I have launched Sincerely, Jackie successfully.

Thank you all for your kind messages and words of support, it looks like we're all excited about this new chapter!

Sincerely,

Don't Allow Fear to Stop Your Business From Growing!

This is a so-real-I'm-shaking-as-I-write-it post. Lately I've felt a little like I've been dealing with a severe case of writers, designers, and an overall creative block. At one point last week, I felt panic creeping up through my stomach, and I knew, in that moment, I needed to get to the bottom of the craziness. So I've been spending a lot of time thinking about what happened to make me all of a sudden feel this way, and I realized what it is.

My business is growing and I am terrified. Absolutely, dibilitatingly terrified.

There are so many things I know that I need to do to continue to let my business grow, and I was SO certain about these things until a few people planted a few seeds of doubt in my mind. And then those seeds began to grow, and then before I knew it, I had allowed a garden of fear grow. Instead of spending my days just doing the things I knew I needed to do, I found myself thinking about them, analyzing them, and then thinking of a million reasons NOT to do them.

For example, hiring an intern. I need an intern, I need somebody to help me prep files, place orders, research new products, and manage some of my vendor contact relationships. Having an intern would free me up to spend quality time on my new business and working one-on-one with my clients in a more timely fashion. I need an intern.

But when I told a few acquaintances about my need for an intern, they kind of looked at me sideways. One person even said that I shouldn't bring on an intern because I work full time, and do I really want to have an intern spending more time on my business during the day than I do? My gut was screaming "yes! Yes that's exactly what I want! I need somebody to help me when I'm not around", but the way this person was making it sound, I began to feel ashamed for wanting that, and like I would be losing the quality of my business. She asked, "What if they screw things up, and you wouldn't even know until you're home from work?", insinuating that I would then be spending more time fixing the mistake than getting any work done.

That was the bad, bad seed. Which grew, and blossomed, and began spreading like a weed through all of my other business ideas.

What if I hire a lawyer to do my trademarking and then the trademark got rejected?

What if I hire somebody to do my website and it doesn't look perfect?

What if I invest in my new business, and then NOTHING comes of it?

What if I invest in my business, and then something DOES come of it, and I can't keep up with it, and have to turn people down, thus halting my growth all together?

WHAT IF I FAIL AT EVERYTHING?

You see, that seed is a damn weed.

But I am no longer watering it.

If I can't launch my business this month, as planned, that's OK - it will launch as soon as it's perfect. I'm going to hire an intern. I'm going to continue to invest in my business, and it will continue to grow. I am going to launch an amazing, successful, luxury wedding invitation line. I am going to succeed.

And I am going to do it all by just taking each and every small step, and just doing it.

I'm going to do it. Say that with me: I am going to do it. I am, I am, I am.

Alright, excuse me while I go and put up a listing for an intern...

3 Ways to Bring Purpose into Your Business

Just the other day I shared my experience with Jess Lively's Business and Life With Intention workshops, however I did not share how my own purpose changed/evolved because of the workshop. While I'm not completely ready to share all of the details, I am excited to share a few insights along with three key learnings that I think you can apply to your business immediately.

 1- Make sure that your brand is truly your brand. Does your company name really fit that special thing that you do, and does it roll off your tongue with pride when you tell others who you are? This was huge for me - and where I spent the majority of my focus during the workshop. It's also why I will be changing my business name in the very near future. I can't share the new name yet, but I guarantee that it feels to me like a warm comfy sweater I never want to part with (thanks to Elizabeth, for suggesting it! And thank you Jess for encouraging the brainstorm session that it resulted from!)

2- Does your branding actually fit you? I'm not just talking about your name here, but I'm talking about the design. The colors, fonts, textures, packaging, logos etc - do they all look like things you'd have around your house? Are they something that you're friends would see in the store and know immediately that it's so you? For a long time I felt like I needed my brand to be different and unique, but after much trial and error, what I found is that I actually needed my brand to be just the same as everything else in my life. Luckily, my colors and branding are very much my style - and in fact, if you were to have attended my wedding or walked into my home, you'd find yourself surrounded by the same whites, creams, aquas and corals that are also part of my brand. Correction, the style is part of my brand, it's part of me and it just so happens that my wedding, home and brand are all also parts of me. Is your branding an extension of who you are?

3- Just because you can do it all, doesn't mean you should. Find other experts that are able to do what you want to do, but can do it better than you could ever do it yourself. Delegating and reaching out to other talented people is a tool to use. For me, I built my entire website myself because I didn't have the budget to hire somebody, but now that I am going to be rebranding, I'm reaching out to people that I know can help me way better than I could help myself. Plus, but letting other people help, I am freeing up my time to focus on other aspects of business. Anybody out there a marketing pro and want to help me get my brand out there more?

Are the above things that you thought about when setting up your business? Are you thinking about them now?

Having a Small Business in NYC

So many people flock to New York City - the city of opportunity & lights - to come visit, to come live, or to come try to make their lively hood. I've lived in New York my whole life, born and raised on the south shore of Long Island and then moving to Queens (part of NYC) three years ago when my husband and I bought our condo. Buying a home was the first time I realized how much of a struggle it is to live in this part of the country (world). Everything is so beyond expensive that it actually disgusts me. When we were buying our 925sqft in Queens, I had a friend that was buying a 2,300sqft home in upstate NY for less than we were paying. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't jealous, and I'd be lying again if I said my husband and I haven't thought about leaving NY. But at the end of the day, this is where our family and friends are, and I think that if I ever left the smell of low tide and ocean, I'd be heartbroken.

Not only are the costs of living in New York ridiculously expensive,  but starting a business is no small chunk of change either. If you live within the 5 boros of NYC, you are required to publish your business in a reputable publication in order to validate the business. If you don't publish, you're business and Tax ID number will become void. There's a good chance that technically I'm a void business right now, because I haven't yet published. I've been dragging my feet because I think it's the stupidest thing in the world, it's super expensive (between $1,000-$2,500) and it seems like a way for NYC to take a crap on small businesses and milk start-ups for whatever money they've saved or borrowed. Regardless of how much I hate the rule, we all still need to do it, and I do plan on having my business published within the next few weeks, even if it puts me in debt.

While each county is every so slightly different, the following steps seem to be the same everywhere. So, if you live anywhere within NYC, plan on doing the following: To have your business published you need to call your county clerk to let them know you started a business, then send/fax them a copy of your article of organization and then they'll tell you what two publications you must publish with. I think that's the part that bothers me the most - that they dictate where you have to publish, and you really have no choice (at least that's how it works in Queens). Anyway, you have to then go and publish an announcement stating that your company is open for business. The cost depends on the publication, some are very inexpensive and some are extremely expensive - but again, you have no choice because it's dictated by the county clerk's office. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that my publications aren't more than $1,500 because any more than that and I won't be able to do it until I have more dough saved up. Also, I do plan on begging the clerk to please show mercy and not give me expensive publications. I am not above begging.

Since I'm on the topic of expenses, and money, and living in NYC, I thought I would open up about something else that has been very much on my mind lately.

It's almost impossible to live in this area without two incomes, and they need to be two good incomes. Luckily, my husband and I are very comfortable right now because we both work full time, however, my ultimate goal in life is to grow Believe Notes into my full time job. I'm not saying I want to leave my full time jobe right now, because I happen to love what I do, but I also know that when the time comes to have children (and not any time soon, btw), I want to be present to raise those children. While I have a ton of respect for successful working moms, I don't know that it'll be the right thing for me. I want to be a kick-ass mom that is home to raise children and also bring in an income. It's an absolutely terrifying future goal because I have no idea if I'll be able to ever bring in the type of income that we'd need to live off of and have the type of life I want to have. To be honest, sometimes I feel a little bitter, because if I were living anywhere else right now (except for the other top 5 most expensive cities in the US) I would be able to comfortably call my current income from Believe Notes a true income that I could maybe live off of. Here in NY, I need to make at least 4 times what I'm currently making in order to be able to move back to Long Island and even contemplate leaving corporate America.

Not being one to shy away from a challenge, I am giving myself 2013 to really push every limit that exists. I'm just curious to see what type of potential is in my little business, and how much more efficient and profitable I can make it. I have to start thinking like a business person that is strategic about the future and try to figure out where I want to be and if I can actually get there. While I love my job, and I really don't want to leave, I also adore stationery, and stationery will give me the flexibility to someday have a better work/life balance situation. And of course, the fact that I live in such an expensive area just compounds my anxiety about the future - but I'll continue to work my butt off (in all jobs) until I know I can confidently go in the direction I need to.

2012 Revisiting the Future Letter & A Year in Reivew

I first read about the idea of a future letter from Jess Lively, who has been writing herself letters for over 6 years. The idea is to write a letter to yourself in the beginning of the year, as if it were already the end of the year and you knew what you had accomplished. It's a fun way to set goals and expectations for the year that's coming.

Last year was the first time I sat down and wrote myself a future letter, and now that 2012 is over and I'm able to look back on what I predicted vs what I actually accomplished, I am really amazed at how productive and growthful 2012 was for my business.  Here is the letter I wrote myself last year, and here are the milestones I hit:

•  We finished our flooring and kitchen remodel. I'm not done with the home yet, but I love how it turned out.
• I did get my Tax ID number & am officially an LLC
• I put together a thorough pricing list, and I update it regularly
• Believe Notes grew tremendously - new products were launched, the NSS was attended, and staging photos has become a whole lot easier (and prettier)
• Networking is still a challenge, but I reached out and made tons of new friends and contacts this year, including the awesomely awesome Jainé, of Brklyn View Photography, who snapped my gorgeous new head shots (which were also a goal of mine!)
• Mike and I did not get to travel nearly as much as we wanted to. We went to Vegas for your one year anniversary, and we had an amazing one year anniversary dinner at home. I don't know that Mike will ever be able to outdo himself. We still aren't thinking about kids, although all of our friends seem to be popping them out lately. Peer pressure ain't got nothin on us
• I've grown a lot on my corporate profession and still hate flying
• And yes, I think I definitely do deserve to congratulate myself! What an amazing year!

I had some other HUGE accomplishments in 2012 that I didn't even know were on my horizon, such as launching Designers Care. Obviously, nobody could have predicted Hurricane Sandy and the damage she would have caused, but I am so proud of myself and the designer community for coming together and creating something awesome! After tackling so much in 2012, I cannot wait to see the huge things that are bound to happen in 2013!!

When Small Business(es) Meet High Stress

I had promised to share the real ups and downs behind owning a small business, and what's more real than a post at 7:30pm on a Saturday night?

The past few weeks have been overwhelming - in both good and bad ways. It's been about three weeks since I started Designers Care, which is a shop filled with gorgeous note cards that are hand stamped using designs donated but lots of talented designers. We've had over 100 sales and raised close to $900 to donate to Hurricane Sandy victims - I'd say the shop is absolutely a success.

But for whatever reason, I just don't feel very successful. I feel exhausted, overwhelmed, and beat down. October through December is my absolute busiest season - between holiday cards for Believe Notes, papers and finals for graduate school, busy season at my full time job, and then of course the chaos of the holidays in general - I feel like I'm starting to shut down.

One day, last week, I went to work without my glasses or my watch and I only had eyeliner on one eye. 

I'm finding that in my stress I seem to be focusing too hard on the negatives: orders are backed up (I must not be efficient enough!), I don't have enough time in the day (so I should get up super early and stay awake super late, right?!), I've made a few mistakes & one of my entire product lines failed (this was the hardest on me, by far). And even though, deep down, I know I'm not failing, I really, really, really feel like I am.

I also know that the more stressed I am, the more stress I put on my husband, and that of course leads to stupid bickering and hurt feelings. He may not be as busy as me in terms of working + school + 2 businesses, but he's NYPD and he certainly has't had a stress-free experience dealing with the hurricane aftermath. Long hours & overtime combined with seeing the underbelly of a city in crisis has definitely lead to an exhausted husband. He and I handle stress in completely different ways - he likes to sit back and do nothing but watch TV in order to escape, while I like to bury myself in even more work to take my mind off of things. But then, of course, we argue about the stress itself because I constantly push us both to do more, more, more, and he is trying to do less, less, less. At this point I think we can agree that we'd both like to just ditch the jobs, and school, and businesses and just try to catch up and cope with all the madness. And thank goodness this is temporary - things always calm down a little in January.

So yes, I feel like I'm failing sometimes - at being a good friend or wife, at cooking healthy dinners, at being present for the people around me. I can beat myself up all I want for missing a deadline or making a mistake, but then I get an email like this and it all seems to melt away:

Jackie,

I know you've been totally swamped! If I can help with anything, let me know. 

By the way, you really inspire me!

--Ann

 

When I'm up at 4:30am working on a design, bleary eyed and exhausted, I can't imagine being any form of inspiration for anything (other than maybe Dunkin Donuts). But I wake up almost every morning to amazing emails from amazing people and I remember that I am not in this alone, and I am not doing this for myself. 

And even in writing the blog post, I may be feeling uneasy about it in the morning, but I wanted to share some of what really happens during high stress - you may be seeing beautifully styled photos, and RTs from fabulous people, but that isn't the whole reality. The whole reality is me at 7:30am in my office building noticing that I have eyeliner on one eye.